GA Price

TITLE: Ways To Become Murdocka Disciples

AUTHOR: Hannurdock

RATING: U

WARNINGS: No warnings, except maybe becoming certifiable after reading it

STORY TYPE: List

CATEGORY: AU, Humour

LENGTH: One-Off

DISCLAIMER: The characters are property of Cannell and company. I just write about them. I don't make bags out of them!


****


1. Reinvent the wheel - make it square, not round and tell people that its better this way.

2. Visit local mental institutions, and then tell your ma or pa which one you think you should belong to.

3. Buy yourself a straight jacket.

4. Laugh to yourself, the more maniacally the better.

5. Keep an eye out for the guys in white, re-direct the guys in blue and talk all night to the little green guys from outer space.

6. Talk to Billy in a crowded street. Better still, carry some dog biscuits to throw to Billy. Even better still, eat the dog biscuits yourself.

7. Develop many personalities for different moods.

8. Develop an inhuman fear of ammonia.

9. Trust the soldier, the broker and the doctor. DO NOT TRUST the lawyer, the fish monger and yourself.

10. Learn to fly a plane through Flight Simulations on a computer that is not switched on.